Oh!ME

At this point if you don't know what I'm talking about you have been living under a rock for the past year or so. I wonder why this saga has made me so crazy in love with the idea of having a vamp bf. The very essence of what he is makes me go ga ga---I'm talking about Edward Cullen. Finally, I'm speaking out on my fascination with this story. My man rolls his eyes at my very mention of this saga, some men i guess just don't get it. Damn i wish that grown ass men were forced to read this series just to see what a fake ideal man should be. What kills me most is that people think that women want a real life Edward when this is not the case at all. I can speak only about myself and say that I like the essence of what Edward is..


I want a man who's unselfish, accepts my flaws, strong protector and wants to be MY one and only-----aaaaaah swooning !!!! only in twi-world does this man exist, DAMN!!! Ok my obsession began with seeing Twilight in the theatre then I bought the 4 book saga. In all my life I have never been so emotionally connected to fictional storybook characters . Stephenie Meyer is a literary genius..She had me on cloud nine one moment and crying the next. Enough with the mushy stuff; so as it stands, now I'm becoming a full blown Twi-hard. You heard me... Twi-hard, living and breathing all things twilight. BTW I'm watching Twilight simultaneously as I'm writing this blog. OME(Oh My Edward)

Twilight: New Moon hits theatres on November 20, 2009 but of course my bestie and I bought midnight show tix 2 months ago(girly giggles). With the new movie coming out I have completely lost it----buying Twilight Saga journals, exclusive magazines, New Moon Soundtrack, trading cards and watching Twilight at least once a day. I feel like a teenage girl with her first crush with every passing moment..


PS: TwiCon headed to SD February 2010. HOLLA!!!!

HEY JEALOUSY

MUSIC VIBE: WHO'S DAVID BY BUSTED

*******************************************************

JEALOUS MUCH? LOL. AS WE SPEAK I AM CURRENTLY SNEAKING TO WRITE MY BLOG. MY BF TENDS TO GET A LITTLE BIT JEALOUS OF THE COMPUTER... SO INSECURE HE IS. "I BETTER NOT BE TALKING TO GUYS" REALLY? I'M A GROWN ASS WOMAN , I CAN DO WHAT THE FUCK I PLEASE. I GUESS THIS STEMS FROM EXES CHEATING ON HIM, BUT I'M NOT THEM SO GET OVER IT. HE CAN'T GET IT THROUGH HIS HEAD THAT THE COMPUTER IS MORE THAN JUST A TOOL TO HOOK UP WITH RANDOM MEN. BELIEVE ME, I TRIED TO LET HIM SEE WHAT I'M DOING TO NO AVAIL. AS HE BECOMES COMPUTER SAVVY, HE WILL FEEL MUCH BETTER ABOUT THE ENEMY.

UNTIL THEN I'LL HOLD MY BREATH...

B.old I.ntelligent T.enacious C.hastising H.ot mess

Here is a Poem I hold dear to my heart:

' BEING A BITCH MEANS....
I STAND UP FOR MYSELF AND MY BELIEFS
I STAND FOR THOSE I LOVE
I SPEAK MY MIND, THINK MY OWN THOUGHTS
OR DO THINGS MY WAY
I WON'T COMPROMISE WHAT'S IN MY HEART
I LIVE MY LIFE MY WAY
I WON'T LET ANYONE STEP ON ME
I REFUSE TO TOLERATE INJUSTICE
IT MEANS I HAVE THE COURAGE & STRENGTH
TO ALLOW MYSELF TO BE ME
SO TRY TO STOMP ON ME,DOUSE MY INNER FLAME,
SQUASH EVERY OUNCE OF BEAUTY I HOLD WITHIN
YOU WON'T SUCCEED
AND IF THAT MAKES ME A BITCH,SO BE IT
I EMBRACE THE TITLE AND I'M PROUD TO BE A BITCH!'

My name is Nika and I'm a mean girl---OK who am I foolin..I'm a Biznitch. Are they one in the same? Sometimes I tend to believe they are. My title stems from childhood, don't know why maybe it was the hand I was dealt at an early age. By age 1 my biological mom passed away and by age 3 I was living with my grandma until age 18. My grandma and grandfather did a great job raising me so that is not the problem, maybe some deep rooted emotional baggage from not having my real mom exists. You ask where my father was ----he was a young widower so he did what he had to do. My father regularly flew 2,000 miles to visit me so I knew he loved me. Could it be a nemesis from my youth who always tried to bully me around because her little sister couldn't stand up for herself when I would make a simple comment. Believe me the bullying didn't continue she was told off with the quickness. Hm mm, whatever it stems from it's a blessing and curse all in one.

When you first meet me I will be standoff ish, just trying to feel you out. First impressions are a big one to me. How you come across to me when we first meet is how you will be treated, sorry to say that but its true. Let me give you an example and you may see my case or may not. I was at work one day, a group of us were talking all of a sudden out of the blue a random person cut in my convo , then and there that person was not on my good list. My impression of this person was that they were dramatic and needed attention ...guess what? I was right! but that's a whole other story.. By now I know you think this bitch got some issues.. PROBABLY

It boils down to this in a nutshell--------I have a low tolerance for bullshit, stupidity and sheep(people who follow and agree with everything).

Please don't do the above and we will get along just fine :) (evil laughs)

TEQUILA? "NOT FOR ME I'M ALLERGIC"

MUSIC VIBE: OMG-SECRET




I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN WITH THIS RANT AND AFRAID ONCE I GET STARTED I WON'T BE ABLE TO STOP. TO STATE MILDLY, I HAVE ABSOLUTE DISDAIN FOR TV PERSONALITY TILA TEQUILA. BEGINNING TO WONDER WHAT HER DEAL REALLY IS? WAS THIS FOR A TRUE STAND AGAINST DOMESTIC VIOLENCE OR A SICK PUBLICITY STUNT. I HOPE NOT THE LATTER BECAUSE BITCH COULD BE ON THE VERGE OF RUINING A MAN'S LIFE , CAREER, AND WASTING MY DAMN TAX DOLLARS ON A FRIVOLOUS TRIAL.

LET ME CUT TO THE CHASE WE ALL HEARD REPORTS AND SAW THE SUPPOSED PICS OF HER BRUISES ON TMZ. FIRST I WOULD LIKE TO COMMEND SHAWNE M FOR HAVING A THICK SKIN THROUGH THIS BITCH'S TIRADES ON TWITTER. HE NOT ONCE MADE ANY REFERENCE ABOUT THE INCIDENT EXCEPT TO GIVE LINKS TO HIS STATEMENT ON WHAT HAPPENED THAT NITE. THE MAJOR PROBLEM I HAD FROM THE JUMP WAS THAT SHE DECLARED TO BE ALLERGIC TO ALCOHOL AND WASN'T INTOXICATED. CAN I JUST PUT OUT THERE FOR THE RECORD I'M ALLERGIC TO CHOCOLATE ----IT DOESN'T STOP ME EVERY MONTH WHEN I'M IN PRINCESS MODE STATUS TO PIG OUT, LOL. NOW MOVING ON , I FOLLOW HER ON TWITTER AND CAN HONESTLY SAY SHE NEVER SHUTS THE FUCK UP!! WHEN THE INCIDENT FIRST WENT DOWN SHE WAS QUIET..I SPOKE TOO SOON---BITCH LED AN ALL OUT BRIGADE OF ATTACKS AGAINST MERRIMAN AND SD DA TO THIS DAY.

SHE BASICALLY SUNK HER OWN SHIP. WHO IS IN HER CAMP? DOESN'T SHE KNOW THAT BEING AGGRESSIVE ON TWITTER WAS NOT THE ANSWER. EVERYDAY IT WAS "THE TRUTH WILL COME OUT " OK I WAITED AND ALL I GOT WERE PICS A COUPLE DAYS LATER OF BRUISES OF HER BEING RESTRAINED. SORRY BITCH THAT TELLS ME NOTHING, TELLS ME THAT YOUR CRAZY ASS HAD TO BE MAN HANDLED FOR REASONS UNKNOWN. WHAT ARE YOU SO DESPERATELY TRYING TO TELL US? PERSONALLY READING HER TWEETS SHE TRIED TO ATTACK HIS CHARACTER BY POSTING LINKS ON STEROID USE , BLOGS OF HIS BEHAVIOR IN NITECLUBS AND FINALLY RE TWEETING COMMENTS HER TILA ARMY POSTED TO HER. ALL I SEE IS A RECKLESS WOMAN HARD UP FOR ATTENTION.

ON A FINAL NOTE, THE DA DROPPED THE CHARGES FINDING THAT THERE IS NOT ENOUGH EVIDENCE TO GO FORWARD WITH A CASE. ON TWITTER TODAY I SEE THAT SHE PLANS TO DELETE HER TWITTER ACCOUNT(2 WEEKS TO LATE). ALSO, SHE NOW CLAIMS SHE IS FULL LESBIAN AND HATES ALL MEN BECAUSE THEY ARE ALL THE SAME. HER CONDUCT IS A SLAP IN THE FACE TO ALL WOMEN OUT THERE BEING ABUSED EVERY 30 SECONDS. BITCH! YOU ARE THE WEAKEST LINK ---LIGHTS OUT.

DISAPPEARING ACTS

I WONDER HOW'S IT GONNA BE WHEN YOU DON'T KNOW ME...ARE SOME LYRICS FROM THE MUSIC VIBE BELOW. HAS THIS HAPPENED TO YOU,WHEN THE FRIENDSHIP(S) YOU THOUGHT WERE STRONG AND LASTING NO LONGER EXISTS. YOU THINK TO YOURSELF WHAT DID I DO? THEN REALIZE YOU HAVE DONE NOTHING YOU JUST BEEN DROPPED BY A "SF". A SF YOU KNOW A SERIAL FRIENDSTER, YOU'RE TIGHT AS 2 PEAS IN A POD AND THEN POOF---- YOU BEEN DROPPED FASTER THAN A HOT POTATO. MY SF CONTACTED ME A FEW WEEKS AGO WONDERING HOW I WAS DOING BECAUSE OF A DREAM THEY HAD. THE MEAN SIDE OF ME WANTED TO SAY "WHY ARE YOU CONTACTING ME IT'S BEEN 2 YEARS? "DO YOU HAVE A GUILTY CONSCIENCE"? I REPLIED "I'M FINE AND YOU" PLEASE TELL ME WHY THEY DECIDED TO SPILL THEIR GUTS ABOUT THE PAST 2 YEARS TO ME LIKE I CARE. BETTER THAN THAT HOW ABOUT THEY ACTED AS THOUGH NOTHING EVEN CHANGED LIKE WE ARE STILL IN THAT SAME PLACE WE WERE BEFORE. WELL I'M HERE TO SAY NO I COULD GIVE A F#$%. GO FIGURE IT'S BEEN A FEW WEEKS AND NOT A SINGLE PEEP FROM THEM. AM I SURPRISED H** TO THE NAH.

*************************************************************************************

MUSIC VIBE: THIRD EYE BLIND- HOW'S IT GONNA BE
SIMPLE MINDS-DON'T YOU FORGET ABOUT ME

6 Reasons Why You Can't Leave a Loser | Lifescript.com

6 Reasons Why You Can't Leave a Loser | Lifescript.com

Shared via AddThis

AUTHORIZATION

MUSIC VIBE: DMX- PARTY UP(UP IN HERE)
LUDACRIS-ACT A FOOL

GIVE ME MY D$%* MONEY BACK! I CHECKED MY BANK ACCOUNT THIS MORNING AND TO MY DISMAY I SEE THAT THERE ARE 2 CHARGES PENDING AUTHORIZATION FOR THE SAME AMOUNT. WTF..... HERE WE GO AGAIN. THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME THIS HAS HAPPENED TO ME AND I SEE IT WON'T BE THE LAST. EITHER THE BANK OR THE STORE HAS F#$% MY MONEY UP. CALLING THE BANK WASN'T ANY SATISFACTION TO ME I WAS TOLD TO WAIT UNTIL THIS WEDNESDAY COMING UP TO SEE IF THE CHARGE FALLS OFF. GREAT! THIS IS FINE AND DANDY BUT I'M NOT GOING TO BE IN TOWN. SO NOW I HAVE TO BRING THE BATTLE WITH ME ON VACAY, NEEDLESS TO SAY I'M PISSED OFF TO THE HIGHEST LEVEL OF PISSTIVITY. I'LL SHARE THE OUTCOME SOON.

$5.99

SO I HAVE BEEN FREQUENTLY VISITING A DISCOUNT STORE IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD AND HAVE FOUND SOME WONDERFUL GARMENTS . WITH THE ECONOMY THE WAY IT IS AND MY LOVE OF FASHION SOMETHING HAS TO GIVE AND ITS NOT GOING TO BE MY FASHION, LOL. MY BESTIE TOLD ME ABOUT THIS SCENE BEFORE AND WHILE I PAID ATTENTION TO HER NOT REALLY. "HOW CAN I FIND FASHION FOR $5.99"? I HAVE GONE TO MANY OTHER PROFESSED STORES WITH THE SAME PRICING BUT THE MERCHANDISE(BLAH) SAID IT ALL "$5.99". NOT UNTIL MY SWEETHEART AND I DECIDED TO GET AWAY FOR THE WEEKEND IN JUNE DID I TRY THIS ESTABLISHMENT.

WHEN I WALKED IN I WAS AMAZED FIRST OF HOW CLEAN AND NEAT THE STORE WAS, USUALLY DISCOUNT STORES ARE A HOT MESS! CLOTHES EVERYWHERE. ASTOUNDINGLY ENOUGH THE STORE WAS COLOR COORDINATED AND HAD ALL KINDS OF SIZES-I'M IN HEAVEN. TO SAY THE LEAST, I WENT APE ISH CRAZY AND ALMOST BOUGHT EVERYTHING I SAW. WITH RESTRAINT I BOUGHT 5 SHIRTS WHICH TOTALED TO A WHOOPING $30 AND SOME CHANGE. YOU CAN FIND GEMS IN THE MOST OBSCURE PLACES YOU JUST NEED A LITTLE LUCK AND PATIENCE.

IZZY (OR ISN'T HE)

MUSIC VIBE: ANDROGYNY BY GARBAGE

GAYDAR ON THE FRITZ! CAN SOMEONE HELP ME? I'M SEEING A STARTLING TREND OF GUYS BLURRING THE LINES, OF GAY,STR8, METRO AND JUST PLAIN I DON'T KNOW. THAT'S RIGHT PEOPLE!!!! A NEW SPECIES OF MALE HAS EMERGED. YOU SAY WHAT DOES SHE MEAN? LET IT BEGIN...MY BESTIE AND I ARE PARTIAL TO A LOCAL RENDEZVOUS SPOT CALLED *MONROE'S.UPON TAKING OUR USUAL SEAT, AN ENERGETIC, BOISTEROUS GUY COMES AND INTRODUCES HIMSELF AS *JASON. HERE IS WHERE MY BEWILDERMENT STARTS. HIS HIGH TONALITY AND INFLECTION OF WORDS DIDN'T SHOCK ME, WHAT CAME OUT HIS MOUTH NEXT DID. "I'VE BEEN TRYING TO ASK THIS GIRL OUT" GASP(IN MY HEAD) REALLY? SLYLY GIVING THE SIDE-EYE TO MY BESTIE. NOW IM THINKING THIS MAN IS GAY RIGHT? WRONG...

APPARENTLY SOMEWHERE BETWEEN OUT AND IN THE D*** CLOSET THERE IS SOME KIND OF MIDDLE GROUND WHERE THE MANNERISM THAT I SEEN AND KNOW FROM MY GAY FRIENDS ALL OF A SUDDEN BELONG TO "STR8" MEN..HMMMMMMM. OK I DON'T BELIEVE THIS FOR A MINUTE. REALIZE YOU ARE TRAPPED AND PICK A SIDE. I KNOW THAT FAMILY AND SOCIETY CAN MAKE THAT IMPORTANT LEAP UNBEARABLE. YOU AND I BOTH KNOW WHATS REALLY UP. GETTING MARRIED(TO A WOMAN) AND HAVING THE 2.5 KIDS DOESN'T MAKE YOU STR8. I HAVE SEEN IT TIME AND TIME AGAIN BE WHO YOU ARE ITS OK. BTW, *JASON STILL SEEMS TO BE SINGLE . I WONDER WHY.. TO THE JASONS OF THE WORLD "HOW YOU DOIN"(in my Wendy Williams voice).


*names and places have been changed to protect the innocent